Misplaced :June:

If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath-

This morning, I’m anxious about any number of things and more specifically the Big Ring Ranch MTB Enduro this coming Saturday. I have not been able to find peace and tranquility very well, or as much as I would like the past few days. This race was supposed to happen in June, however Mother Nature won in the end. I feel tense and unsettled no fewer than a couple of times throughout the day: Worrying about pedantic things like gearing, my level of fitness and health, and I worry about “why” I was talked into this in the first place I worry a lot, because I find comfort in worrying.

The first thing I try to do when my worrying mind takes over, is to figure out what is not working right now in this beautiful moment. Sounds easy enough right? For me personally its harder than it sounds. Some mornings there’s a clear answer to be found during a sun salutation, but often it’s jumbled and convoluted – for my mind is not entirely present. I feel like I’m “hanging out” and going through the “motions.” I feel like I’m going to disappoint a bunch of family and friends – You – My Dear Readers. The once solid relationship I had with myself is spiraling out of control.

Other mornings, though, I really don’t know what the problem is. On the surface it appears that everything’s going fairly well, my breath is in tune with my flow and my mind is centered in the moment. Although, buried under the surface: I’m still struggling with worry.

The more I struggle with worry, the more anxious I become. I desperately need to find peace and tranquility, but how? Where do I start?!?

Daily Meditation:

Does what I shared above sound familiar? Some folks go for a walk, others head to the gym and surrender to a warm bath afterwards to find peace and tranquility. However, through being bold and trying, surrendering to the moment This is when we find peace and tranquility.

Time to head out for a morning walk.

CultFit Peace


It Might as Well be :Fall:

Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them-

As any working parent knows, sometimes you have to think creatively to juggle work, partaking in outside activities and keeping your child engaged and out of trouble. Or am I trying to stay engaged and out of trouble?!? Anyways Last Fall during cyclocross season I could not find a sitter on a regular basis, Grandma was busy doing grandma things and letting my 8-year old son stay at home alone is not an option . So I decided to take him along with me.

There he sat on the swings, flanked by a few new friends he instantly befriended. I was proud of him playing nicely pushing the merry-go-round when it was his turn; then hopping aboard to take in the fun. As he settled into playing carefree, I started to warm up and get ready for the race, and before too long I was comfortably in my single speed cyclocross racing groove.

That is, until about ten minutes after the call to the starting line, when my son suddenly blurted out from the top of the slide castle (by top – I mean the very top, like on the rooftop top). It wasn’t a cute, that little boy is adorable shout mind you. It was one of those incredibly eager, excited, this kid must be crazy or whatever shouts you expect a rabid sports fan to let loose during the heat of battle. Every set of eyes within a half mile immediately focused on him, perched gallantly high above, Star Wars t-shirt, Yankees hat and all … My heart immediately went silent on the backside of the course. I didn’t know what he was saying, but as parents we know in an instant when our kids are the center of attention! Making my way back to the start, I could make out that his eyes were glowing wide with delight, he had a huge smile on his innocent face and I could finally make out what he was shouting:

Go get em’ Dad! Gears are for chumps and soccer moms!

Daily Meditation-

I could hear the crowd laughing now and starting to join in with my little dude, supporting their rider on this cool October morning in a more boisterous – colorful way. In this magical moment, somewhere between trudging through a sand pit and jumping over obstacles, everyone in attendance understood a 8 year old’s perspective on not taking life too seriously and having fun.

I would personally like to take a moment to thank the following kind and passionate folks for making the below schedule possible for me: Omaha Bicycle Co. and Endless Bike Company – Thank you!!!

Big Ring Ranch Endure Sept. 13th

The Wicked Wilson 100 Sept. 14th

Flatwater Twilight CX Sept. 24th

Omaha CX Weekend Oct. 11th

Omaha Jackrabbit Oct. 18th

Star City CX Series (Wednesday Nights)

*Winnipeg CX/Canada National Championships 2014 Oct. 24-26* Personal Highlight of the Fall Calendar *

Spooky Cross Nov. 1st-2nd

Gravelicious Gravel Grinder Nov. 1st

South Dakota Cyclocross State Championships Nov. 8th

Jingle Cross Nov. 14th

Nebraska State CX Championships Nov. 23rd

Iowa State Cyclocross Championship Dec. 6th

CultFit Fall

 


The :Cosmic: Game

Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself-

What are we seeking when we engage in self-reflection along our path to discovering our true authentic self? I asked myself this question during a recent cycling event, one where I had quite a bit of time to think about “things” in life.

Stumbling upon my path to discovering my authentic self has been riddled by a myriad of close calls, disappointments, pain and yes: Suffering. Years of engaging in destructive behavior seemingly crushed me as a person and still haunt me, even as I proof read this post.

Everywhere I sought help and refuge, I was continually told the way to discover “who we really are” is to simply scrape away all the dreck that has been heaped upon ourselves over the years. Sounds easy enough right?!? If life were only as easy as reading a $5.99 self-help e-book or a top 10 list to discover your true self blog post. The more self-help advice and guidance I marinated in, the more I began to notice how self involved I was becoming. I gradually became concerned only with what affected me or only with that which is useful to, or focused primarily on myself. I started to make every day life “things” that were not about me, about me, and I became blind to world unfolding around me The more I looked inward, the more I tuned out. I stopped living life.

Each one of us has a self that is beautiful, flawed and unique. Each one of us are blessed with a complicated set of life experiences that no one else has. Our lives are an accumulation of experiences – both good, bad and the ugly. We are amazing – dynamic creatures, and we are continually a work in progress!

Daily Meditation:

These experiences, however, are the very “things” that the searching to reveal our true authentic in a book or whatever, toss to the side as unimportant or distracting. My path to an authentic self, starts with acknowledging my woeful self-deception, that I am my own worst enemy and bringing my Son along to a few cyclocross races last season helped to shed light on what matters the most to me in life (more on this next week).

I hope each of you reading today have an amazing weekend, take care and be well!

CultFit Deception

 


The Summer Ends

The summer ends, and it is time
To face another way. Our theme
Reversed, we harvest the last row
To store against the cold, undo
The garden that will be undone.
We grieve under the weakened sun
To see all earth’s green fountains dried,
And fallen all the works of light.
You do not speak, and I regret
This downfall of the good we sought
As though the fault were mine. I bring
The plow to turn the shattering
Leaves and bent stems into the dark,
From which they may return. At work,
I see you leaving our bright land,
The last cut flowers in your hand.

- Wendell Berry

CultFit Summer


Many :Thanks:

Music always sounds better on Friday-

Tomorrow I ask you to support the women that dare to ride! The inaugural Global Solidarity Ride takes place tomorrow and I simply cannot express how important this ride is to me. Shannon Galpin of Mountain2Mountain is doing amazing work bringing the simple joy of spinning along on a bicycle to the women of Afghanistan.

Daily Meditation:

Before the weekend begins, I personally would like to – Thank You- for your continued support of my your little blog-o-thing! Be well this weekend and please take care!

CultFit Believe

*Please join me this coming Sunday in Omaha for the annual Tour de Garden Omaha! I’ll even pick up the first coffee or tea for you – My treat!*


Sweater – Weather -

To lose confidence in one’s body is to lose confidence in oneself-

Throughout our lives, our daily experiences feed into the deep, old sense of shame that grips us. We assign this ongoing feeling of shame to parts of our bodies that we see in a negative light. Ranging from feeling awkward in front co-workers and friends, feeling our of place running on the treadmill, to race day failures or even minor training oversight(s) can be attributed to simply not looking “right” … Only serving to feed from our inner trough of self-hatred.

Have you ever blamed a poor performance, or failed to show up to an event because you were ashamed to be seen? Soul sapping thoughts that you are too “out of shape“, I don’t belong or deserve to be here with all these “fit” folks? When we lose confidence in ourselves, we instantly surrender to failure, instead of pursuing what our hearts passionately want to do. Why is this so?

My battered and beaten body is hands down, the biggest target of my ever so critical inner voice. No matter where I stand in life, it continually provides feedback of my many imperfections and keeps me from fully relaxing in my own skin

Daily Meditation:

Each morning when we wake, we are afforded the beautiful opportunity to hide or reveal our true selves. When the harsh “voice” is telling us to keep our sweaters on or to stay home on race day … Be brave, be bold my friends – for you truly belong in the here and now.

Have a blessed weekend and please take care!

CultFit Belong


Nebraska :Ground:

Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm-

It is extremely difficult to discuss failure, especially for someone like myself.

Take a look around this morning – A lot of folks like to boast about their weekend triumphs. Raising my hand, I fully admit that I more comfortable talking about where I excel, rather than identifying any potential weaknesses I may have. Primarily – Navigation and attention to the provided cue sheets. Luckily these guys helped me out a bit:

Ride 001

150+ miles on the harshest of open roads is relatively “easy“. Failure on the other hand, is a painful and powerful experience. It’s not easy getting lost around Waverly, Nebraska. Making the conscious decision to swallow my pride and limp back to the starting point – Off course. However, being open and accepting of the moment allowed me to build an even stronger foundation, for the next time out – Omaha Jackrabbit!

Daily Meditation:

In the moment, it may not seem like it, although each time we encounter a setback during a ride or “whatever” in life  We are that much closer to doing it right the next go around.

I would like to thank my friend Scott for sharing his inspiring photos from Saturday – Thank You! For more pics of the Gravel Worlds, please click HERE.

Ride 004